I will wait for you...

I'm working on figuring out some things in my life. I'm stuck between my former free spirited independent self and being a mom with a baby that will depend on me for everything. I'm super ready to take on my new role. It's hard to figure out what I can balance alongside my new role. Once I get in the swing of being a new mom, I think I'll get a better idea of my future.

I don't like quitting and I don't like failing, so I don't want to start something new if I cannot fully commit to it. Lily has slowly changed me and made me realize that success means nothing if I don't take the time out to care for her. When God asks me one day, "What did you do with what I gave you?" I want to be able to say that I took the greatest gift he gave me and loved her, took time to care for her and raised her to be a loving woman of God. I'd hate to stand there in front of him and say, "I used my creativity you blessed me with to make as much money as possible so I can have nice things." I think I can share my talents with her. I don't have to share them with everyone in the world...because I think she will become my world.

I will wait for you, Lillian, to make these decisions about my future...