His grace abounds in deepest waters + free instant download printable watercolor hand lettered art

Dear Lillian,

Yesterday, we were walking out of Target. You insisted upon carrying this waste basket that I purchased for your new art studio and inside of it contained the plastic bag with a few other items we purchased. As we were walking out the door, you dropped the basket. There was a lady behind us, and I said, "OH excuse us, I'm so sorry." The lady huffed, rolled her eyes and stepped over us. Literally walked over the pile of goodies on the floor. No offer to help us, no "it's okay, it happens', nothing. My first thought was to call her a bad name in my head. I started to say to you that some people are just rude. But I stopped myself.

the chalkboard wall in your new art studio

There have been numerous times lately when I'm out running errands and I have hit my limit. I've had days where the little things get to me. Days where I want to have a meltdown in public because I'm exhausted and a mom with a toddler. Those are the days when I need grace the most.

The lady at Target yesterday needed grace from us. It made me realize that we need to extend grace to everyone, even if we don't know what is going on in their life. On days like yesterday when people don't extend grace to us,  God's grace is sufficient enough.

Scripture says we must live in harmony with one another, be sympathetic and have compassion for others. Being rude back was not the right thing to do.

8 Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.

9 Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.

1 Peter 3: 8-9

This is my watercolor hand lettered "Your GRACE abounds in deepest waters" FREE print that you can instantly download. Or purchase a high quality print from me.

Here is the link to download the FREE high resolution printable file! 

When I am weak, he is strong...

I ran across an old blog I kept while pregnant and through my daughters first few months of life. I teared up reading through it. I wrote letters to her and am sad that I stopped. So I thought I'd continue here as a way to catalog them for her for the future and will also import the old letters so they will all be in the same place. :)

Dear Lillian,

You're 3 weeks shy of turning 3 years old. You started dance classes a few weeks ago. You love dancing around the house, so I thought we would give classes a try. You were nervous at first as I sat beside you and helped you get into first position. I casually backed away and let you dance on your own. You loved it. You loved the ballet shoes, the lavender tutu and the sounds your "skate" shoes (tap shoes) made as you tiptoed across the wood floors. Last week during class you fell down. You didn't cry or scream when you fell. It was only when I peeped around the corner to see what happened that you caught my eyes and teared up. I could see you trying so hard to hold it in, but you lost it.

It broke my heart. There were only ten minutes left, so I let you sit in my lap until the end. You told me you quit. You didn't want to go back. You were done with dance and threw your tap shoes across the room saying they were too slippery. I tried to calm you down.

 

 Today, we went back to dance class. You were so excited, but a little under the weather. I think that played a huge role in you not wanting to go in the dance room. You said you didn't want to dance anymore. You said you fell and the skates were too slippery. You clung to me like glue. We ended up leaving the class early. I brought you home.

Today, we watched youtube video after video of dancers falling. Then I showed you videos of dancers dancing, tapping and moving across the floor so gracefully. You were in awe. You said, "mama, bring me my skates." You put on those tap shoes and started mimicking those dancers.

Last week she fell at the end of her tap class and told me she quit and refused to go near her slippery "skate" shoes again. She clung to me today at dance and wouldn't even participate, partly because she isn't feeling well and partly because she's embarrassed. I know she LOVED her dance classes because she danced around the house all week. We left dance class to go home and watch videos of people falling while dancing, then videos of tap dancers. She asked me to put her tap shoes on her and has been mimicking the them. She said she wants to try dance again next week!

A video posted by Ashley DeYoung (@ashleydeyo) on Oct 2, 2015 at 9:04am PDT

I want you to know that you will fall down. You will get hurt and you will feel low. Don't let the thoughts in your head or outsiders hinder the great work that God can do through you. I am here to tell you that when you feel like you're done, you've hit bottom and you're weak...know that God's grace is sufficient for you.

2 Corinthians 12:8-10 says: 

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

When you hit that point where you want to give up, know that HIS grace is sufficient for you. HIS power is made perfect in weakness. Continue on seeking HIS will and letting HIM work through you, Love.

xoxo

I rest, too.

I placed you in your swing in front of a window and you calmed down.

Ms. Mabel decided to bother you and you flipped out.

You finally calmed down and I put you in the pack and play. It's your first time to sleep in there.

You sleep.

You've been crying so much that there's not been a lot of sleeping around here for me or for you. Today, I celebrate. You slept and you are asleep now. 

There are days where it's really hard to deal with your crying. I spend those days just holding you so you don't scream. I feel like I'm losing control of my house since I spend my days holding you. The moments like now where I do get you to nap...I rest, too, even though I should be getting things done around the house. 

Before you, silence would fill my house daily. A lot of times, in the silence, I'd hear God whisper. So today I rest and listen for his whisper and hope for some peace. 

Sacrifices

Hi baby girl,

This sweet face makes any bad day instantly better! :-)

Today was difficult. All overtime for your dad was cut and it really put life into perspective. We depended on that money. I'm sure we would be fine financially, but it would be tight. Living paycheck to paycheck. We would not be able to save money for a house or get ahead on our car payments. If something were to happen to the cars or God forbid, you or us health-wise, we wouldn't have the extra money to cover it. We figured we would start getting ahead now, instead of waiting until we are in trouble.

So we made a big decision today to quit living lavishly. We cut down on our phone bill, cut our cable by $130, cut a few extra bills that we don't need right now and are looking into selling one of the cars. We decided it would be best to start stashing money for a rainy day.

I'm telling you this, because I want you to realize that you are our priority. I would hate to not be able to afford to buy you the diapers you need or the shots that you need because I drive a really nice car that I can't sell because I owe more than it's worth. You deserve the best, better than the best.

I don't need HD TV, 1000 channels, DVR and on demand. We were spending $210/month on cable...that's over $2500/year...and in 5 years that's $12,600! ...A down payment on a house.That's just from cutting down on one bill. :-)

Hopefully, we will be good stewards of our money and will set a good example for you. I don't want to cut back on things just to save, I want you to grow up in an environment where you realize what really matters. I want you to handle the money you are blessed with in an honorable manner.

How he loves...

During this trip you learned to smile. You have proceeded to manipulate me with it during your 3AM feedings. Good thing you learned how to do that, too, because I was about to go crazy with the lack of sleep. I can't get mad when you flash that smile at me! :-)

You were spoiled rotten with books and toys and clothes! Sadly, you will have no recollection of your first Christmas or what you received. As thankful as I am for those presents, I hope you will remember at future Christmases how loved you are. It's not about the presents. It's about the baby Jesus, the Prince of Peace...and how he loves us. Oh how he loves us.

He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
And oh, how He loves us oh,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He loves us unconditionally, he knows our faults, yet he still loves us. I hope you never forget the love he has for you. The love a parent has for their child is modeled after the way God loves his children...unconditionally.

Turn negatives into positives

Today I took some photos of you and I together. You cooperated for most of the session. Then you had a meltdown. I was glad to finally get some good shots of your face. Generally, you bury it in a pillow on the bed so I can't see it.

We spent the day doing typical things...cleaning, laundry, lunch with your daddy at Panera, running errands. You do so well with us toting you around town.

Monday you will go on your first road trip with me. I hope and pray that it won't be stressful or raining. It always rains when I drive to Nashville.

Quality time with Lillian

Happy baby/sad baby

Big Blue Eyes

7 weeks old & lifting head up!

Of course it's not a photo shoot with Lillian without screaming!

Every day people come up to me and tell me how beautiful you are. Even your dad said the other night that you keep getting cuter every day. I like to tease him and say that you are going to be a gorgeous artist. He likes to say if that's the case, then you'll be poor. He wants you to be smart and successful. I hope for all of the above.

Ultimately, I hope, with whatever career you choose, that you will be persistent. Don't let someone tear you down or destroy your dreams. Always take the negative and turn them into positives. Creative minds tend to take things personally. It's hard not to, but don't let the thoughts of "not being good enough" get inside your head. Life is too short to spend it worrying about what other people think of you.

I have learned in the past year to not look at what other peers say about my work or about me. They do not know my heart. I also learned to not look at other peers' work. I just do my own thing now and I really don't care if I'm the best in the business. In my industry, it's easy to blog-stalk other peers and either copy their work or get feelings of inadequacy from seeing it. I'm not creating art for them...I'm trying to use my talents to glorify God. I pray that is what you do with your life. Use your talents wisely and glorify God with them.

Silver and Gold...

I'm watching Hope Floats right now. I love that movie. The full quotes is...

"Childhood is what you spend the rest of your life trying to overcome. That's what momma always says. She says that beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. Try to remember that when you find yourself at a new beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up. And it will..."

I hope you never experience a heartbreak. I know they help you grow, but it's painful. I pray you will be a good judge of character with any person you get into a relationship with whether it's a friend or more than a friend. I've made too many mistakes with relationships.

You need relationships in your life, but surround yourself with relationships that will build you up, not break you down. Be kind to everyone, but guard your heart. It's precious and delicate. Choose friends that will be timeless...those that will stay around through thick and thin. Be ware of those that have jealous or judgmental behavior. Those people are toxic.   

A true friend will be there with a hand out if you fall down. They won't desert you or use you until you don't benefit them anymore. Maintain your integrity within your relationships. Don't try to be like that person. Just be you and if they are a true friend they will stick around.

I'm traveling to Nashville on Monday with you, and you will meet some of my true friends. They have been with me through so much and I'm thankful they still remain my friends even though distance separates us. They have become like sisters to me.

I remember learning this rhyme in Daisies. "Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold."

Train called life...

John 16:21 When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

As I sit here and watch your perfectly created face sleep, I'm thinking back 10 months ago when I found out I was pregnant with you. It was a big shock, but I never thought of you as a mistake. You were perfectly planned and knitted in my womb by God.

I was terrified of labor and delivery. I was terrified of being a mom. I was terrified that I was not in control. I had no choice in what you would look like, what gender you are, what you will be when you get older or how healthy you are.

The only choices I have are in how I raise you and love you unconditionally. I was watching the Today Show this morning. There was a lady on there who had a daughter that has autism and is deaf. It never crossed her mind that her daughter may never hear her voice or be able to speak when she was pregnant. It made me think about how I have no control over your life. I can control certain things, but it's ultimately God who is driving this train called life.

People kept telling me to pray for a healthy baby and pray for a healthy pregnancy. I kept saying that I wanted a healthy baby and pregnancy, but I was praying for God's will with this pregnancy. How selfish could I be to want something other than his perfect plan for my life? Praying or wanting anything other than that would mean that I don't trust him.

2 Samuel 22:31 This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.

We need to quit demanding things in life. While I would never wish anything terrible on any child, God can use any situation to glorify him and how selfish can we be to take that glory away from him.  Lily, God chose you to be a girl born to your father and I. He chose a path for your life. I pray you follow him. I pray you live according to his will. Don't seek after your own selfish desires. Accept and be grateful for what he has blessed you with and the plan he has for your life.

This time is ours...

Dear Lillian,

Happy One Month!

I've got a million things that need to get done. I need to write thank you notes for the baby gifts. I need to do laundry, clean the bathrooms, do the dishes and edit photos from my latest session. But tonight you want to be held...all night. I'm okay with that.

It's an indescribable feeling to know that 98% of the time I'm the only one that can comfort you. I'm the one that can make your crying stop. I'm the one you want to hold you. As exhausted as I am with the lack of sleep lately, I'm okay to rock you for an hour so that you can get some sleep. You won't be this little for very long and there will come a day when you won't need me anymore.

Right now, this time is ours.

I will cherish your every moment...

Tonight I fed you and rocked you. Your head was on my shoulder and we rocked cheek to cheek. Your tiny breaths tickled my neck and I thought how I didn't want that moment to end. I want you to stay little forever.

As exhausted as I am, I want to cherish every moment and every inch of you. Your scent of sweet milk and burts bees, your coos while you sleep, the piggy sound you make while you eat and how you sound like Maggie Simpson with your pacifier.

I want to remember:

Your tiny fingers around my thumb

The way you rub your eyes when you're tired

How sweet you look while sleeping

The wrinkles on your feet

How much you remind me of your father

The way you looked at 3 weeks old

How you smile while you dream

Welcome Lillian Faye - October 24, 2012

Lucky, Lucky, Me! from Teresa DeYoung on Vimeo.


You're here! Finally!!

At about 3:30 on Tuesday, October 23, 2012 I called my doctor since I was having contractions 3 minutes apart. They said go to hospital immediately.

So I hopped in the car in a major panic, called your dad and drove myself to the hospital.

I'm pretty sure no one believed that I was actually in labor at the hospital. They monitored me for several hours and came the conclusion that my contractions weren't going away. They kept me over night.

My doctor came to check on me in the morning and said "We're having a baby today." Two minutes later, I found out my dear grandmother passed away. Two minutes after that I was wheeled down to labor and delivery. Talk about an overwhelming emotional wreck...I ended up needing oxygen, because I put you in distress.

 Ain't I purdy? No one said labor is glamorous!

A few hours later, you were born...3:37PM to be exact! 6 lbs 12.6 oz and 20.25" long!